Maximized JOY

We had a wonderful Christmas season, and are sad that today is Will's last day of Christmas break.  Tomorrow will be just an ordinary winter day and the girls and I will be missing the extra set of hands, playmate, and adult conversation.  It has been nice to reflect back on the last couple of weeks this afternoon.  This year, with a baby experiencing health issues and an active toddler I knew that I needed to make things as simple as possible and ensure that the activities we chose to do captured the holiday spirit with minimal stress.  I read several great books on the subject including Celebrate Simply by Nancy Twigg, Hundred Dollar Holiday by Bill McKibben and Unplug the Christmas Machine by Jo Robinson and Jean Coppock Staeheli.  To cement this concept even more with me, Will told me about a radio morning show he had listened to that discussed how different Christmas would be if guys were the ones in charge.  It struck a chord with me and I realized that for some reason a lot of women (myself included) feel the need to make Christmas perfect.  After reading the above mentioned books and then hearing Will tell of what he heard on the radio, I felt I was finally free to let go of my need for the 'perfect' Christmas and focus instead on creating family memories and just enjoying the season.  

In search of more meaning and less stress, I decided to forgo making my annual holiday cookies and opted instead for some scoop and bake ones to have on hand for company and Santa.  This worked out great and we still had tons of baked goods from our generous family and friends. I know there will be Christmases in the future where I will have the time and energy to bake my favorite holiday cookies, but for this year it was a nice change.  I still got my baking fix however with a craft project Lucy and I made for our family and friends - salt dough ornaments.  I cannot rave enough about this project as it definitely scored a 100% on maximizing meaning and holiday spirit without sacrificing sanity and joy.  Lucy enjoyed it too, and it was a fun way to bake with Lucy without worrying about germs, taste, and perfection.  Here Lucy is below in the various stages of making the ornaments.  The project was simple enough that she was able to do every step herself with minimal interference from me.

Thanksgiving weekend we put up our Christmas tree.  Lucy didn't really remember the Christmas tree from last year and was super excited to help us hang ornaments and sing along to Christmas music.  Emma also enjoyed hanging her first ornament up, as you can see below.  

One of the things I also looked at skipping this year were my annual holiday cards that I send out to family and friends.  Will has never liked this tradition, as he is usually the one licking envelopes and stamping envelopes at midnight two days before Christmas.  He was also quick to remind me that if guys were in charge of Christmas there would be no Christmas cards.  After really thinking it over, I decided that I valued sending cards to my family and friends and it was worth the time and energy involved.  There is something about sitting down with the prior year's address list and taking stock.  Adding new friends and new family members to the list is always fun - this year we added several great new friends and even several new family members (shout out to my first niece Ellen!).  It also is a nice way to remember those that we said goodbye to over the past year.  Taking my grandma's name off of the card list was emotional, but it caused me to stop and remember some great Christmas memories with her.

We of course continued with our tradition of decorating Luke's grave blanket with homemade ornaments as it is a great way to involve the entire family in heaven and on earth.  This year we painted birds.  While Lucy was painting, she kept saying things like, "I hope Lukey likes my ornament Mom."  "Mom, I know Lukey is just going to love this ornament!"  And the most heart wrenching, "Mom, I wish Lukey could see my ornament I made for him."  Lucy took this project very seriously.

And yes, painting without a shirt IS more inspiring - and less messy!  Here we are below having a family hug while admiring Luke's freshly decorated grave blanket.

Another continued tradition was a visit to Santa.  Last year Lucy was very uncertain while she sat on Santa's lap and so I ended up holding her next to him.  She didn't have a problem though, telling him very clearly that she wanted Elmo stuff for Christmas.  This year, it was all Will and I could do to get her within 10 feet of Santa and if we got any closer she would scream, "OUCH!!  OUCH!!  OUCH!!"  This kind of creeped Santa out who was quick to tell the people nearby that he was NOT in fact hurting her.  Emma didn't really care one way or the other and sat on Santa's lap while watching Lucy's dramatic display with some curiosity.  After Will backed a safe enough distance away from Santa, Lucy did tell him that she wanted Gummi Bears and suckers for Christmas.  I will have to readdress this tradition next year to see if the value to stress ratio is worth it.

On Christmas Eve we went to Will's parent's house for brunch and to exchange gifts.  This worked out great as the girls are at their best in the morning and we were still able to come home in time for naps.  While they were taking their naps, Will and I got an early dinner ready so that when they woke up we could bathe them, don Christmas dresses, have dinner, and then head to Christmas Eve mass.

Usually for Christmas Eve mass we go to the church we were married at in Detroit, or whatever church is closest to us since we have to get there so much earlier to get a seat.  This year we decided it would be nice to spend Christmas Eve at our church and I am so glad we did.  It was absolutely lovely and it is a tradition we are starting from here on out.  Here Lucy is below next to the nativity before mass.

An overwhelming sense of joy and gratitude filled me on Christmas eve, sitting in the pew before mass enjoying the peacefulness of the church and the beauty of my family.  I wanted to capture it in some way so I took out my iPhone and started taking pictures - that is until Will caught me and shot me a look that said "not appropriate!"

 After mass was a more appropriate time to capture the moment, so I asked the family behind us to take a picture of us in our Christmas finery.  It's not often that we look this put together!  In fact, I think it was the first time as a family of four on earth that we were all clean-smelling and color-coordinated at the same time!

When mass was over, we drove around a bit and looked at Christmas lights, then headed home and had the one item I had made special for Christmas Eve - mint chocolate chip ice cream, paired with a batch of the scoop and bake chocolate chip cookie dough from our local fruit market.  Let's just say that the stress to joy ratio was not worth it here.  The stress began when I needed to find creme de menthe for the ice cream recipe.  It was two days before Christmas, and I had tried four different stores and they were all out of the green minty liquor.  It didn't help matters that I was fighting a horrible cough and was also looking for a certain brand of all natural cough syrup that was missing as well. Not until I was standing in the liquor aisle of Meijer with Lucy, feeling completely anxious because Will was circling in the car outside with a crying Emma that I realized that perhaps I should write this one off as a loss and call it a day.  As I was waiting for the manager to check in the back for the creme de menthe, Lucy kept asking rather loudly, "Mom, is this where your cough syrup is?  Mom, where's your cough syrup?  Mom, I see your cough syrup!  There it is!  Creme de menthe!"  I received several looks from complete strangers stocking up their holiday liquor cabinets as I tried shushing Lucy and explained that creme de menthe isn't cough syrup.  After all that stress we ate the ice cream Christmas eve and no one but Will really liked it.  To make matters worse, it had completely slipped my head that I have been avoiding dairy because it upsets Emma's stomach when I nurse her.  Yup, I was up all night with Emma, cursing the creme de menthe!  Epic fail on value to stress ratio!  AND - Lucy still calls cough syrup creme de menthe!

After the girls were in bed, Will and I sat down to write our annual Christmas letter to Luke to put in his stocking.  It is at times like this that the pain of missing him is the most raw.  What would it look like to have all three of our children in their Christmas jammies in front of our tree?  Luke would have been three this Christmas and I can only imagine how excited he would have been, wondering what Santa would bring him in the morning and interacting with his sisters.

On Christmas morning we all headed downstairs together, thanks to the baby gate at the top of our stairs.  Lucy was super excited and got right down to ripping open presents.  At first she assumed that all of the presents under the tree were hers, but once she realized that some were for Will, Emma and myself, she was equally as eager to help us open ours as she was hers.  We couldn't help but notice that she seemed disappointed after she opened each gift however.  When I reminded Lucy that she still had a stocking to check out, her eyes lit up and she ran to see the full stockings hanging from our stair railing.  Here are some pictures of the sequence of events.  The first picture is of her screaming so loud she bent in half...

Then, looking up at the stockings...

Then patiently smiling for a picture before she got her stocking.

After she dumped the contents of her stocking out and saw that Santa had gotten her Gummi Bears and suckers she started jumping up and down with excitement and said, "Santa listened Mom!  Santa listened!"  After that her entire demeanor changed and she excitedly ingested sugar while playing with her new toys.  Lucy also found Emma's new toys to be as good as hers.  Here they are below opening presents.

As expected, Emma liked the paper more than her toys.

After we cleaned up the paper, Emma seemed content with her new toys.

When the last present was opened, we had a Christmas breakfast of cinnamon rolls from a tube from Trader Joe's (this is the first year I didn't make my traditional Christmas sour cream coffee cake) along with an egg casserole that we had made up the night before and popped in the oven when we came downstairs in the morning.  We stuck a candle in a cinnamon roll and sung happy birthday to Jesus.  Joy to stress ratio - priceless.

Instead of attempting naps before we headed over to my parent's house for the day, we decided to pack up our over-stimulated, and in one case, over-sugared children and make the drive to the cemetery in hopes they would sleep on the way.  Our plan worked and both kids conked out in the back, giving Will and I a quiet trip to the cemetery.  I would have wished for the girls to join Will and I at Luke's grave, but we left them asleep in the car next to Luke's grave.  When we got out at the cemetery we were met with an unexpected surprise.  My grandma's headstone had arrived!  This caught me off guard and as nice as it was to see her headstone, it was also extremely emotional seeing her name next to my grandpa's and Luke's graves.  It made her passing more real than it has been - and more final.  And it is the finality that hurts so badly.  I still can hardly believe she is gone.

After drying my tears we got back in the car and headed to my parents house.  This year it was just my parents and siblings, minus my brother Joe who lives in Florida.  It was also the first Christmas with the new generation of cousins.  Here is Lucy below with her two new girls under the Christmas tree - her cousin Ellen and sister Emma!  I can't wait to see them grow together and become lifelong friends.

 I couldn't resist posting this picture below with Emma snuggling her Aunt Jane.

 And here is a picture of Emma wearing her new Christmas present from Aunt Jenna!  Jenna made dinosaur tails for Lucy, Emma and even a miniature one for Simone.  I'm sure there will be pictures to come over the next year of the adventures with these cute little dinosaurs.

The day after Christmas in years past have been spent in various retail establishments spending gift cards, making exchanges/returns and cashing in on some great after-Christmas sales.  This year we decided to try something different.  To begin with, we had made a point with our family and friends to minimize the amount of gifts exchanged so that we could better focus on the less materialistic side of Christmas.  Will and I also limited the amount of gifts we gave the girls, and our families did as well.  This really helped reduce stress in the fact that I didn't have to find space to put all of the new objects or stand in long lines to return/exchange large quantities of items that didn't fit, work properly, or were needed.  And I felt like the gifts we did give and receive were more thoughtful and meaningful.  Because of this, we spent the day after Christmas in nature.  As a family, we seem to be at our best outside.  There are no household distractions for Will and I, the girls don't fight or whine and everyone just seems happier.  Fortunately, the almost 50 degree weather helped this new way to spend Boxing Day, but I hope that come rain, snow or sunshine we carry this tradition on.

I would be remiss not to note that we began our holidays over Thanksgiving weekend with a baby who would stay put where ever she was sat.  On our last day of this wonderful holiday season, our little baby is not only crawling like a pro, but climbing and scaling furniture as well.  What a way to end the holidays with a bang, Emma!

Yup, this holiday season we chose to maximize joy and minimize stress.  I am glad that I took the time in the beginning to assess my priorities and make sure that each activity we committed ourselves to was both thought out and in alignment with our meaning of Christmas.  Yesterday we took down the Christmas decorations and cleaned the house from top to bottom.  I am excited to have a clean house and new goals to start off 2012 (and for Emma to stop trying to pull the Christmas tree down and eat the ornaments!).  We have many things we are working on this year and I am excited to write about it on this blog while documenting Lucy and Emma's growth.  I can't believe that we will be celebrating Luke's 4th, Lucy's 3rd and Emma's 1st birthdays this year!  I wish you all a happy and healthy new year where joy is maximized and stress is minimized!

Stay tuned and I will do a separate post soon of the girl's holiday portraits as well as Emma's 9 month pictures.

The End of the Year with Lucy

It has been a busy month for us with Emma's health issues, holiday preparations and holiday festivities.  Lucy has handled the bustle quite well, all things considering and has enjoyed increased TV viewing as a result.  I will do a separate post on our holidays, but for now, here is Lucy's past month in review.

Lucy has found creative ways to keep herself occupied while I was otherwise preoccupied - mostly on hold with doctors offices - and caring for Emma.  It became a given that the price I had to pay for quiet while on the phone or trying to get Emma to sleep was a mess to clean up when I was finished.  Messes I was greeted with included:

• the entire dining room table and all six chairs painted with a paper napkin mixed in the leftover milk from Lucy's morning cereal (who knew that leftover milk could cover that amount of surface area!)
• an entire box of Kleenex emptied and then 'bouqueted' in the crack behind my bedroom door
• Lucy's bed completely striped of all of it's sheets and blankets and laid quite nicely in the upstairs hallway with all of her dolls tucked sweetly under the layers of covers
• a half-eaten chocolate covered buckeye (covertly taken from Aunt Maureen's annual Christmas cookie tray) stuffed in between the couch cushions and only discovered later that evening when Will got up from the couch and I thought he had sat in poop - after sniffing him I was relieved to find out it was chocolate!
• my favorite house plant that I've had since I was five - methodically plucked of 50% of it's leaves
• countless pieces of furniture, toys and floor coverings 'washed' in the water she carefully emptied from her cup pretty much anytime I didn't have both of my eyes focused completely on her
• numerous meals turned to artistic expressions of finger painting, dipping, soaking, splatting, crumbling, pouring, mixing and smearing.

And no, I did not take any pictures of the above mentioned attempts of Lucy trying to stave off boredom and neglect because frankly I was too busy trying to figure out how to keep my cool while resigning myself to the fact that the quiet was worth the price.  I am now trying to direct all of her creative energy into structured activities like arts, crafts and baking.  Fortunately this past month I have had a lot of help from my family.  Below is a picture of Lucy with a castle her Aunt Jane helped her build.  Note the plucked house plant in the background.

Lucy really has been a good girl despite the large wake of disaster she has been leaving behind her.  One of her favorite things to do is play hide and seek with us.  Sometimes we don't even know she is playing the game she is that good.  In the picture below a fellow patient alerted me to Lucy's whereabouts when I couldn't find her at the chiropractor's office.

Lucy had her second haircut of her life this past month.  She took the event very seriously and told my friend Kelly who cuts our hair, "I want curly hair, not spiky."  You see, Lucy describes my hair as spiky and heaven forbid she is made to look like her mother!  While Lucy was getting her hair cut, I was overwhelmed by one of those mom moments where the love and pride I felt for her was so strong I was just beaming.  She looked so beautiful and grown up, sitting completely still under the cape and taking all of the beauty shop patrons ooohs and aaahs over her curly hair so calmly that I could hardly believe she was mine.

One of the first snows of the season appeared from the window to be perfect packing snow for snowman building.  After getting both girls all bundled up, we got outside and I was able to shovel the entire driveway while bribing Lucy with the snowman we would build when I was finished.  Unfortunately, I was wrong on the type of snow and we were only able to manage a miniature snowman.  Lucy was disappointed to say the least, and I learned a valuable lesson for setting snowman expectations with two year olds - never count your snowmans until the snowballs are rolled!

The weather has been warmer than usual and we have taken full advantage.  About a week before Christmas, I decided to capitalize on the mild weather and the girls and I went downtown despite some rain.  It ended up being a picture perfect morning of storybook Christmas shopping.  I had Emma in a front carrier while I held a large umbrella and Lucy walked with her little umbrella next to us.  Shoppers and shop keepers alike were all in the Christmas spirit and I found the most wonderful and unique gifts.  I even found a book for Will that had a picture of our house taken around 1930 in it!  It felt so good to spend my hard earned Christmas cash right in the heart of my community on gifts no amount of Amazon searching could have found, while learning more about the people and places of where we live.

I will end this post with Lucy-isms from this past month:

• "Look at those bad boys!" exclaimed Lucy, pointing at the Christmas lights on Main Street
• "Mom, it's a pee explosion!" Lucy, describing what it felt like to pee after holding it in too long
• Lucy reached up to Will and said, "Pick me up before you go-go."
• "I'm so excited I have to dance!"
• And finally, her latest invention to get us to come back upstairs after we have tucked her in, "Dad, my covers are wounded!"

Happy New Year!

Parlor Tricks and Prevacid at 8 Months

Emma experienced many developmental milestones as well as some health issues this past month.  This little girl has kept us busy and the lack of pictures to choose for this post proves it.  Emma’s biggest accomplishments this month are her first two bottom teeth and crawling.  Last month she was scooting around on her tummy and able to go wherever she wanted as long as there was nothing blocking her path.  This month, she can crawl and climb over just about anything short of our safety gates.  We've even had to lower her crib mattress because she pulls herself to a stand and tries to climb out of her bed.  We are currently child-proofing our house too.  You would think our home’s safety should be top-notch since Lucy has made it to two and half years old safe and sound, but this time around is a lot more nerve wracking.  Our adorable two and a half year old just refuses to be child-proofed!  Play money, stickers, costume jewelry and food are just a few of the objects that bring great curiosity to Emma and severe anxiety to her parents.

Emma has become quite the novice at parlor tricks this month as well.  She will kiss me on the mouth with her mouth wide open when we say "Kiss" and will clap our open palm when we sing "Patty Cake".  If you ask her a question like, "Are you hungry?" or "Do you want to play?" she will nod her head repeatedly while bouncing and smiling.  And just this past week she has started waving her hand when we say "hi" or "bye."

Emma loves to hold onto our fingers as she walks around the room and isn't content to be held without trying to climb up our shoulder or arm.  It is a great workout for us - Emma the climbing medicine ball.  Fortunately, Emma still loves being in the baby carrier all snuggled up to me which has been great for playing outside with Lucy or while shopping with the two of them.

Our little Emma gave us quite a scare a couple of weeks ago.  About ten minutes after I had laid her down in her crib sound asleep I heard choking and gagging on the monitor.  I ran upstairs and grabbed her out of her bed and started thumping her on the back.  It took almost two hours for the coughing and gagging to stop.  When I finally got her back to sleep and laid her down the choking started all over again.  I spent the night sitting upright with her in the rocking chair and in the morning I called and made an appointment to see our pediatrician, thinking that Emma had caught the croup Lucy had the week prior.  Emma's sinuses and lungs checked out completely clear at the doctor the following day and we began to suspect that perhaps Emma was suffering from acid reflux like Lucy.  Little details started adding up - since about four months old, Emma has been steadily falling off of her growth chart curve.  When she was born she was in the 50% for weight and length.  Now she is under 5% on the growth chart, meaning she is smaller than more than 95% of babies her age.  Our second clue is that she has been refusing to eat solids.  She makes a "lemon" face every time we present food to her.  According to the pediatric gastrologist this is common among babies with severe inflammation in their esophagus from months of acid reflux eroding it away.  Our third and most trying clue is the fact that we can no longer lay her flat for anything - diaper changes, putting her coat on or sleep without her arching her back and screaming.  That part is like déjà vu from Lucy who went undiagnosed with acid reflux until she was ironically the same age Emma is now.  After a trip to the emergency room due to more severe choking and finally an appointment with the pediatric gastrologist this past Wednesday, Emma is now on Prevacid and slowly, slowly, ever so slowly doing a little bit better.  To say that we are frustrated is an understatement.  I can hardly believe that we have another child with sleep issues of this magnitude.  I feel like I am missing the best parts of Emma’s babyhood because I am constantly trying to get Emma to sleep or eat.  She is at the point now where she is sleeping so little and eating so frequently (for weight gain purposes) that I feel like we are back in the newborn stage again.  The only difference is a newborn doesn’t get into everything and sleeps most of the day!  We have another appointment this coming week with the gastrologist, and we are hoping that she starts to show some more improvement so we can avoid extensive testing and the anxiety that something more serious is wrong.

Our little bean continues to be good natured through all of this.  As long as we aren’t laying her down, she is nothing but smiles and cuddles.  She continues to be a mama's girl, but she definitely loves her sister and her daddy, in that order.

We are looking forward to Emma’s first Christmas and hopefully experiencing a Silent Night soon!

Lucy-is-ums

What a month we have had!  Lucy had croup earlier this month with a fever for a week and a cough for over two.  The fever and cough got worse at night, so we had many sleepless nights of rough coughing and reading stories in the bathroom with the shower running on hot so Lucy could benefit from the steam.  Our bathroom counter looked like a chemistry lab with every natural cold remedy known to me lined up from honey to vitamin D, probiotics, fish oil, apple cider vinegar for foot soaks, homeopathic cough syrups, tea and tons of Kleenex.  During Lucy's sickness she became addicted to watching TV and her favorites included Dora, Clifford and Sesame Street.  Now that she is better, Lucy is having a hard time with 'healthy' TV limits.  This is new for us, as before Lucy was sick she really didn't mind TV and had no problem turning it off herself or turning it off when she was asked.  It seems we have entered a whole new phase that I'm guessing will be here to stay.

Lucy has discovered feelings this month.  Maybe this was triggered by her sickness, but either way she has become very descriptive of her moods.  The other day she woke up and told me, "Mom, I feel cranky."  And boy was she right!  She also will whine and tell us several times a day, "I want to watch Clifford...because I'm so sad!"  Or, when we agree to let her watch Clifford, "I'm so cited!!"   Even better, the other day Lucy was standing on her tiptoes, peering out of the window and told me, "Mom, I'm just so happy."  When I asked her why, she told me, "Because it snowed!"  But probably the pinnacle of her new found understanding of feelings is how she understands feelings in others now too.  When Will and I were having an emotional moment about Luke, Lucy went and got me a Kleenex and while she was wiping my face she sweetly asked me, "Mom, do you want some candy to make you feel better?"

Along with Lucy's expanded emotional vocabulary she has also become quite knowledgeable about time.  The days of the week are used in her conversations as are minutes and hours.  When asked if she would like to go to the park she now responds, "Um, I might be busy.  How about Friday?"  The other day Will asked her to hold his hand while we crossed a parking lot and she responded, "I can't Dad, my hands are busy."  She even has included dates, times and appointments into her conversations about Simone.  "Mom, I can't go to the library on Tuesday because Simone has an appointment at 9:30."  When it is time to get ready to go somewhere, Lucy will tell me in a sad voice, "I can't go mom.  Simone is sick.  I have to stay with her so she won't be lonely."
 
I made Lucy a baby carrier for her dolls this past month.  I was going to give it to her for Christmas but well, I got tired of carrying a doll every time we went somewhere.  I mean, my hands are full enough with a baby, a toddler and all of their accessories.  The baby carrier is working out nicely.

Now when we go for walks or hikes, Lucy has her baby in her carrier, and I have Emma in mine.  The picture below is a replica of what it looks like when I go shopping.  Just picture the doll Babsie who is in the carrier as Emma, and the doll Huggums who is in the shopping cart as Lucy.  Oh, and picture Lucy as me, but with shoes on.

Lucy is still talking about her imaginary friend.  In last month's blog post I misspoke about his name and called him Hevnah.  I will make another attempt to write it, but it is hard to get the proper spelling from someone who according to Lucy, "lives far away.  You have to go on a plane to be there in heaven, at school."  His name is Heinkon and the other day Lucy refused to let me get her out of her car seat when we arrived home because Heinkon was coming for her.  I was at a loss on how to respond to this so I left her there for a while.  When I came back I asked her if she was still waiting on Heinkon and she told me that "he's still at school mom.  You better get me out."  Heinkon alternates between being her brother and her friend.  Fortunately she has a real life sister to play with, and the two of them play very nicely together still.  I am bracing myself for the day Emma has an opinion about Lucy taking her toys away, but until then, I am enjoying their sweet interactions.  I found them the other day playing together in our office closet.

Favorite Lucy-isms this month include:
-When asked a question she will respond, "I can't know" whether she knows the answer or not.
-She calls a bean bag chair a "bean bang" chair
-When trying really hard to do something like carrying a heavy object she will say, "All my might!"
-When she is begging for something she wants, she will say "but I want it so badly!"
-When I warned her about wiping snot in her eye and how it could cause pink eye, she got super excited and started jumping up and down saying, "I want a pink eye!  I want a pink eye!"  So then I told her that I was joking about pink eye, and that actually her eye would turn the color of snot and she stopped.
-When Lucy was baking with me she asked if she could put the "poke of salt in it."  It took me a moment to realize she was talking about a "pinch of salt."
-Lucy loves a song she calls "Dancing Queen" and begs us to watch it on YouTube.  It took several days before we figured out she was talking about "Come on Eileen."  She watches the Dexy's Midnight Runners version and even dances with her hands behind her back just like them.
-Lucy has entered the WHY stage.  For everything she now asks WHY.  If you have any tips on how to end a 'why' conversation, please let me know.
-The other day Will was washing Lucy up without his shirt on.  Lucy looked at his chest and said sweetly, "Dad, I like your boobs!  I've never seen that color before!"
-When I was at the chiropractor's laying on my back getting an adjustment Lucy came over to me and started unbuttoning my shirt.  When I brushed her hands off she kept opening the buttons.  Finally, I asked her what she was doing and she told me, "Mom, let's get some air in there."

Below is a picture of Lucy on Will's shoulders at our annual downtown Christmas lighting ceremony.  It was cold, rainy and way too crowded, but Lucy had a blast.

It is definitely beginning to look a lot like Christmas! 

Sunny Days and Seven Months

It's hard for me to believe, but Emma is closer to being one than a newborn now.  We have had a somewhat rocky month with her and sleep.  Any day now we are expecting her bottom two teeth to pop through, and when that happens, I am hoping her good sleep habits return.  Besides showing a stubborn streak with sleep, she remains a fun-loving, wide-eyed girl who is observant of everything.

We have introduced more foods into Emma's diet, some of which include a ham sandwich with the works on it and garlic spinach pizza.  Some might say that I've become lax in my parenting with subsequent children, but the truth of the matter is Emma takes full advantage of whatever is in my hand while I am distracted with Lucy.  And based on how she freaks out when I realize what she is chowing down on, it is no wonder she refuses to eat the baby food that we present to her.  As soon as the spoon laden with our homemade baby food crosses into her personal space (about a two foot radius from her) she squints her eyes shut and purses her mouth tight.  We have found a compromise fortunately, with a little mesh food bag attached to a handle that we put 'real' food in.  Sometimes we put the little mesh bag in the freezer for a little bit so that the food is slightly frozen to help with teething pain.  Meshed contents so far have included steamed carrots and potatoes, fresh apple, pear, banana, and skinned grapes.  Emma will gnaw on this at least long enough for us all to enjoy a meal together.

Emma has also found relief from teething pain in the most unusual objects.  She likes to chew on Lucy's doll's faces until Lucy notices.  Below it looks like she is resuscitating Simone, but she is really just relieving some teething pain.

So far my favorite Emma-invented teething remedy is chewing on Will's big toe.  I'm not sure if it's the special odor or tangy taste that numbs her gums, but either way it works.  Based on this method, we will know the moment her teeth do poke through based on Will's surprise when something sharp pierces through his sock.



Emma loves to stand.  If she is sitting anywhere near something she can use as leverage, she will scoot over to it and pull herself up to a stand.  This is very dangerous, as she doesn't have the balance yet to maintain her upright position and usually will do a half spin topple and hit her head on something hard.  In fact, Emma loves standing so much that she refuses to sit in her special little baby tub we have for bath time.  Because of this, we decided to try her out in the big tub with Lucy.

 As you can see, she still preferred standing.  After a couple of baths though, she finally was convinced to take a seat and relax which has introduced us to a whole new world of bath time fun - or as Will calls it, "Planned Chaos."  Lucy dumps water on Emma's head, Emma cries.  Emma splashes water into Lucy's eyes, Lucy cries.  Emma pees in the tub, Lucy screams.  Lucy takes Emma's bath toy away, Emma screams.  You get the idea.  But, it does save us a lot of time (and water!), as we no longer have to bathe them separately.

Emma generally doesn't like to get undressed and absolutely hates getting her diaper changed.  My sister Jane has classified her as a Never Nude (from the show Arrested Development) and if we weren't a cloth diaper family we would seriously consider getting those disposable diapers made to look like jeans in an attempt to recreate a pair of jean cut off shorts.

Maybe Emma is a Never Nude because she is always cold.  For bedtime I dress her in footed pajamas, a fleece blanket with sleeves that zips up from head to toe and a knit hat.  With this getup she would still wake up in the middle of the night ice cold, so I added a fleece blanket on top, which goes against all of the information the medical field warns parents about to prevent SIDS.  Thankfully, a friend of mine recommended using an afghan as a blanket since it at least has plenty of holes in it to prevent suffocation, but is still heavy and warm.  That is working great, combined with pumping our furnace all night long.  We received our first heat bill for the cold season and were semi shocked about the price.  I had to laugh though when I realized that we have finally found something to spend money on for Emma.  The clothes, cloth diapers, toys and accessories have all been handed down from Lucy.  Up until this past month, Emma hasn't really cost us a dime.  So, while the rest of us are sleeping in shorts and a t-shirt, Emma is finally warm and cozy and a part of the family budget as well.

Here Emma is below greeting Lucy in the morning.  Emma usually wakes up before Lucy, and will look around for her until we go into her room.  As we approach Lucy's door Emma pumps her arms and legs in anticipation and lets out a squeal when she sees Lucy.  Lucy in turn tells Emma, "I missed you when I was sleeping Emma" and when I ask Lucy what she dreamed about that night she always responds, "Emma."

We have had some beautiful fall weather this past month.  Living in Michigan, if the calendar says November and the thermometer reads above 50 degrees we do what we can to go outside and enjoy it like it's the last hurrah for the next six months.  This is part of why I love fall so much - it makes you appreciate every beautiful day.  In the picture below, I decided to capitalize on a sunny day this past week by packing a lunch and having a picnic outside our library which has a beautiful garden and walkways.  After we ate, we sat in the sun and read the books we had checked out earlier that morning.  It was one of those moments in motherhood that was easy and beautiful.  The kind of moment that was exactly how I pictured motherhood to be before I became a mother. 

Now that I am a mother, I understand that the shiny moments are mixed in between a lot of not so shiny moments.  But because of this, I appreciate those picture perfect moments like a sunny day above 50 degrees in November.

Lucy's Two and a Half!

Lucy is officially a two and a half year old.  I must say, I really do like this age.  She is the perfect mix of independent and cuddly.  She continues to sleep well and plays on her own ninety percent of the time.  However if Will is home that percentage changes to two percent as she is a daddy's girl and well, her daddy is a lot of fun.  Lucy was super excited this month because we got to celebrate her daddy's birthday!  She told me a couple of weeks ago that she wanted to bring Will lunch for his birthday and meet his students.  We did just that, and she is still talking about it.  Here she is below with Will and Emma, eating her lunch in Will's classroom.

When we got to Will's classroom I was all impressed with myself for remembering such details as plates and napkins to go with our picnic.  Panic started to set in though, when I realized I had brought nothing to disinfect the desks we were about to eat on!  After rummaging through the diaper bag, I found some extra disinfectant wipes from the doctor's office that they give you when they want a urine sample.  That took our picnic lunch to a whole new level of classy, but at least I wasn't worried about catching any germs.

I got a little teary eyed when I realized that one day Lucy will be big enough that her feet will no longer dangle at this desk.  It seems her growing up is already catching me by surprise.  Little things catch me off guard like the steadily rising height of the hand prints on my stainless steel fridge door, or how she can put the straw in her juice box by herself now.  The other day I was on autopilot getting her ready in the morning when she shook off my hand that was attempting to get her dressed.  She asked me to leave her room and close the door and promised that when I came back she would have a surprise for me.  So I went and got Emma ready and when I came back, there was Lucy sitting proudly on her bed completely dressed beaming from ear to ear!  No matter that her pants were on backwards and she was wearing a lime green short sleeve shirt with magenta plaid shorts - the fact that she got dressed all by herself was amazing to me!  She had never done this before.  I was very proud.  Granted, the following morning when I suggested that she get herself dressed she screamed "NO!" and ran away, but still.  The fact remained that she has the ability to dress herself now.  She even goes potty by herself now too, and pushes us out of the bathroom and closes the door behind us so that she can have "privacy."  This always brings a shudder to me when I hear the splash from the contents of her froggy potty being dumped into the big toilet, as she is still too short to get on the big toilet by herself.  I've told her to leave the contents of the froggy potty there and I will clean it up - really, I WANT to clean it up, but she insists on doing it herself.  Keep in mind she really only has to use the potty when I am in the shower or feeding Emma.  One morning I stepped out of the shower and found her cleaning a smear of poop off the bathroom floor with a wet wipe.  Lovely.  It is very hard for me to be angry though, as she is really trying to be independent and I do value that trait in her.

Lucy has learned a lot about cause and effect this month.  Will chopped a tree down in our yard and Lucy watched as he swung the axe.  When the tree finally fell to the ground Lucy clapped and jumped up and down.  Then she asked Will to put it back.  When Will explained that he couldn't put it back she started crying and demanding over and over again - "Put it back!  Put it back!"  Along these same lines there was a house and a restaurant near us that both got knocked down on two separate occasions.  Lucy watched the bulldozer and backhoe level them with fascination.  Now, whenever we go by either of these sites, she demands in a whining voice over and over again - "Put it back!  I don't want it knocked down.  Put it back!"

 

Lucy's imagination is still quite vivid.  This month she has been talking about her brother "Hev-Nah" which is a name she made up.  Upon further questioning to find out exactly who this person is, she has told us it is her brother in heaven.  We think Hevnah's name is a variation on heaven and we are wondering if this is her way of processing the fact that she really does have a brother in heaven.  She calls Hevnah on her play phone and tells us about conversations she has with him.  Fortunately, he is a good amount more friendly and well behaved than the tales she tells us about Simone.  Lucy continues to tell us all of the bad things Simone has done.  The other day I had just finished telling Lucy about how it is hard work for me to have to clean up all of her messes (okay, maybe I was yelling a little bit) when she went and told Will that, “Simone is really messy daddy and I am tired of cleaning up after her.”  That only gave me slightly elevated levels of mom guilt when Will related the story to me.  What really sends my mom guilt levels into overdrive however is lately Lucy has been telling me in a sweet and calm voice right after I finish venting my frustrations to her, “Mom, I love you.  I love you mom.  Mom, I just love you.”  She continues to repeat these various endearment combinations until my face changes and the anger is gone.  I’m not quite sure if she is genuinely being sweet or if she is that smart and has found a way to disarm my anger.  Either way, it works.

Some of my favorite vocabulary from this past month includes:

-Lucy tells me, "Mom, type in Dot-Com" any time she sees me on the computer.  Or even better, I find her at the computer pretending to type saying, "Dot Com."

-She calls a head band a "Rubber band"

-As we were driving home from trick or treating at the Farmer’s Market, Lucy stuck her head in her Halloween bag, inhaled deeply and said, “Mmmmmm, it smells like candy in here.  Want to smell it mom?”  Choking back immense feelings of pride, I took the candy bag and as I inhaled deeply, I thought finally, someone who appreciates the same things I do!

-"Mom, I just got to tell you something ____".  Fill in the blank with whatever randomness you can imagine.

-When Will was driving the other day and exhibiting somewhat hurried behavior Lucy piped up from the backseat “Will, be careful not to tip the car over.”  This almost made me pee my pants, because I was thinking the same thing, just in different words!  To represent Will fairly, Lucy also comments on my driving – “Whoa, Mom!  Slow down!” or just “Whoooaaa!”  Might I add that these comments are always appropriately timed too.

-And the vocab word of the month "Squirt".  She uses this word in all sorts of combinations but my favorite one was when she told us that, "I just squirted a fart in my pants."