No Sleep November

We are definitely in a routine with homeschooling now.  I'd say about one day a week we struggle with the appropriate attitudes that would allow learning to take place, but despite those hiccups, I have to say that I can already see big leaps and growth in all three girls since we started the year back in September.  It is exciting to watch how slow and steady increments of learning can add up to something really big.  Here we are below, in clockwise order: doing school at the kitchen table, Emma soaking her feet while reading a book, soap that my friend and I made in our crock pots outside while the kids played on a random weekday, Lucy ready to go to yoga class, and Violet who likes to "draw" as she calls it.

The girls like to help me in the kitchen.  Here they are below, mixing, cutting and arranging.  We made homemade cheese crackers, chicken pot pies, three berry pie, carrot and apple muffins and chicken stock all in bulk this past month.  It is much quicker to cook by myself, however I am hoping the positive experience I try to impart when my little helpers want to be with me in the kitchen will pay off big when they set a home cooked meal they made from scratch in front of me at the table.

Lucy and Emma proclaim that they are each other's best friends which is music to my ears.  When they are apart and come back together, they tell each other how they missed each other and have even established a secret code for when they need to discuss something that they don't want me to hear.  I am choosing to be happy about this, as one of my greatest hopes is for them to be life long friends.  In the top left hand picture below, I found all three girls snuggling in my bed one morning.  To make the picture sweeter, Lucy had a stuffed animal that I got at my baby shower for Luke to represent Luke in the sibling snuggle.  I received three stuffed animals at my baby shower - a yellow duck, a teddy bear and a grey hippopotamus.  Each sister has claimed a stuffed animal as their own, and Lucy and Emma both sleep with theirs cuddled close every night.  I often wonder how Luke would be with his three sisters.

I also wonder if Luke would have taken after Will.  Will handles his role as the only earthly male in our family with grace and humor.  In the top left hand picture below, I couldn't help but take a picture when Will called me into the bathroom to inquire as to why his shelf space keeps getting smaller and smaller in a bathroom that only he uses.

Our cat is a boy, but Will claims this doesn't count.  Charlie is such a friendly little guy and I'm guessing if he lived in our house he would be borderline annoying.  But, since we only cuddle him when we are outside, his affection is mostly appreciated.  Now that the weather is colder, Charlie comes and sits at our front door and watches us go about our day.  When Violet notices that "YarYar" is at the door, she goes to the kitchen and takes out a mini paper plate that we feed him his wet cat food on and then begs Lucy or I for the wet cat food to go and feed Charlie.  In the bottom two right hand pictures, Charlie is playing with the kids with balls and also showing Violet how to breach the security net we have in place.

 We had quite a blizzard this past month and the kids loved playing in all of the snow it brought.

Charlie followed us on the sled rides, whining the entire way for us to go back home.  Violet played in the snow for the very first time and got a kick out of the sled that is just her size and how her fingers felt stuffed into her mittens.

 We had lots of fun with friends this past month, and made sure to take a day off with them when they had a day off from school.

 Will and I attended a nice dinner for his work and the girls and I all got haircuts from Will's cousin in the comfort of our kitchen.  She even humored Violet and pretended to cut her hair so that she felt included.

We had a nice, relaxing Thanksgiving.  We played games, did crafts, colored together and enjoyed lots of food.  Violet was miraculously healthy for a brief time and we even got out and shopped the sales on Friday afternoon.  In the bottom left hand picture Violet was putting random toys into the cart as Lucy and Emma browsed.

Before November, I had offered myself into various volunteer roles and was feeling pretty excited that I was finally able to contribute to something outside of my own family.  All of the things that I had extended myself for took place in November which is when I realized that I was in no position to volunteer my time beyond my little family.  Violet was sick for most of the month and our already precarious sleep was reduced to almost nothing.  I was able to graciously get out of some commitments, but others I still had to fulfill.  This was super frustrating to me to realize that I am not capable of much besides taking care of three kids.  On my paper calendar (and in my head) it seems to me like three kids should not take up every bit of the 168 hours we are each given in a week.  But the reality is, for me, they do.  I am still coming to terms with this, but I am telling myself that this is a season in my life and it won't be like this forever.  This season of my life is exhausting mostly, but scattered throughout my days are small moments of pure bliss with my babies.  The joy comes in short bursts, strung out farther apart than I would like, but it is just enough to keep me going and to continue to put my all into this little life that Will and I are building.

Violet at 19 Months

Violet continues to blossom as our family comedian.  She makes us laugh all of the time, and her antics are always a pleasant surprise to me.  Will claims that I found Lucy and Emma equally as funny, but I have to say, there is something different about her humor and I think it is because she has learned everything she knows from her older sisters. When I ask her to do something, she will yell "NO WAY!"  and run away laughing.  When I tell her no, she will respond by saying in a very whiney voice, "Whhhyyy?"  The other day we were reading a little farm book while we were waiting at the doctor's office when she spotted the udder on a cow and started yelling, "BOOB!"  Or how about sitting in church last weekend when she started saying "ewwww" to the boy sitting behind us.  I swear she knows when I am trying to divert her attention too, as she will just keep saying whatever word it is that is getting the reaction.  Fortunately for all of us, we think she is cute so her toddler antics are funny and not tiring yet.  Yet.  Here she is below, throwing a fit.  Adorable.  And yes, she likes to wear snow boats around the house for fun.

She has been playing on her own a little bit more this past month, and loves drawing, or as she calls it, "Draw", playing with her baby dolls, with the play kitchen and her pull-along toys.  She is obsessed with Lucy and Emma's Barbies and will scream, "BARBIE" while knocking on her sisters' bedroom door.  Fortunately, Lucy and Emma have figured out that Violet can be bought off with a decoy Barbie and will leave the rest of the Barbies alone if given just one Barbie to hold and play with.

She loves reading books, and her attention span is growing as well.  She loves the book Little Quack, which she refers to as "Quack" and I love when she says the title of the book, "Moo Baa La La La."  

Perhaps the best part of her growing attention span is her new interest in watching TV.  I know that aspiring for your kid to watch TV may sound a little backwards, but keep in mind that Violet only sleeps in 30 to 40 minute increments and that my only chance for a diversion is the TV.  She asks to watch Elmo, which is a bit frustrating for Lucy and Emma who have better ideas on what they would like to watch during their screen time.

Parenting Violet is both exhausting and wonderful, all at the same time.  Here she is below, clearing the table of the counting bear manipulatives Lucy was using for math.  Sigh.

I also caught her swiping a carrot and applesauce muffin that was cooling on the kitchen table.  Imagine my pride when I saw that she knows how to peel the paper off of the muffin no problem.

When I asked what she was doing with the muffin, she responded by saying, "Are-eee" which means sorry.  How could I not laugh?  Especially when she gave me a big grin and then took a bite of the muffin!  Violet also will say "PEASE" for please and if she wants to take part in something other family members are doing or eating she will yell, "ME!"  She refers to herself now as "ViVi" which sounds a lot like "ByeBye" and she has mastered her biggest sister's name finally, calling her "Ooh-See".  Violet has started calling me "Mommy" like her older sisters do and loves making sure each member of her family is involved in whatever it is that she is doing or eating.  For instance, if I give her a snack, she will say, "Emma?" until I give her some snack to bring to Emma.  Then she comes back and says, "Ooh-See?" and on and on.  She is so thoughtful as she really does bring the food to her sisters.

This past month has been difficult with Violet's health.  She has had constant head colds and coughs since October, and then she had croup.  This was my first experience with croup and it was very scary.  I was just barely surviving before croup, waking up with Violet every 30 to 40 minutes throughout the night.  Three nights in a row of her being up all night with croup and I was done for.  Pushed over the proverbial mental cliff.  We had barely recovered from croup, when she had an overheating episode where she went from fine to a fever of 104 in a matter of minutes.  The silver lining to all of this is that we have learned some important clues to managing Violet's challenges.  We are learning more about Ectodermal Dysplasia and it's effect on breathing and sleeping.  We have been able to integrate some new techniques and I am hopeful that we will continue to find solutions.  In the meantime, it has been 19 months of very little sleep and it is hard.  I feel extremely overwhelmed when I look past today's challenges, so I am trying to stay in the present moment.  I know of far worse things that parents are facing with their kids, and that isn't to try and minimize what we are going through, but I am confident that we will find a way through this, one day at a time.  

The past 19 months have had drastic effects on my personal growth and I have Violet to thank for showing me what perseverance is, and for finding out who I can count on when life gets tough.  Violet, it is true when I say I love you more than sleep itself and nuzzling your soft chubby cheeks and burying my nose in the nape of your neck while breathing in your sweet baby scent as your fuzzy hair tickles my nose is one of my favorite ways to live present in the moment.