July and Our Own Backyard

Will was on vacation for most of July, and he spent a good third of his new found free time being my on call artist, handy man, carpenter and free labor to help me pull off getting my booth ready for the local Lavender Festival.  I seriously got into way more than I could reasonably handle, and the scales of balance in my life were not in harmony as a result.  But, there is nothing like a deadline to help you dig down deep and pull out reserves you didn't know you have and I am proud of all that we accomplished.  As of right now, I am thinking I won't take on a challenge that big again until the kids are much older.  But, as the work fades and the fun memories stay on, who knows what I will decide next spring when offered the chance again.  I am hoping that if I do it again, it will be easier the second time around.  I know what to expect better, and my booth is completely built now too.  Plus, I have a better feel of how to make enough inventory for 10,000 plus people, and also how to assembly line the production of my products in more efficient manners.  All of this I learned through trial and error which takes up considerable time and energy but is a very good teacher.  Below are pictures of my family helping me pull off something they never signed up for when they agreed to be my spouse, my kids, and yes, my cat.  Even Charlie helped by being a giant ball of persistent, loving fur.  In the below picture, he believes he is helping me tie ribbons on bars of soap.

Will built most of my booth and the local craft stores provided the rest.  We found these really cool metal letters on clearance at one of the stores and Will and the kids tirelessly followed me to all of the craft stores in the tri-county area to find enough of the letters to make a sign.  After several days of searching, we had to figure out what to do without an "A" or an "E".  Leave it to Will, and he turned a "V", "Z" and an "F" into my missing "A" and "E" and just like that I had "Harding Honey".  Will also built display racks for my soaps and even took on the task of setting up and anchoring my tent.  Below is arguably the toughest part of the entire show - packing and setting up.  It was a tight squeeze, but by leaving behind two of my kids with my parents and taking their bigger car, we were able to get it all to the festival grounds in one trip without an inch to spare.

We lucked out with the weather which miraculously cooled off to the high 70's and low 80's for the three days of the show.  This not only made it more comfortable for myself and my two friends that came out to help me, but also for Violet to be able to come and be with us too.  I could not have handled the customer traffic if it wasn't for my two friends that volunteered to help.  They also sold their own items but by far put in way more time for me than they needed to and I am forever grateful for them.

I think my kids enjoyed themselves for the most part too.  Out of the three days at the festival, a family member or friend was almost always there, spoiling them and taking them around the festival.

Once I knew that I was going to participate in the Lavender Festival this year, I decided to look into doing a fundraiser for the National Foundation of Ectodermal Dysplasia.  My first idea was to make a violet infused soap to sell as the fundraiser, named after of course Violet, but also, violets are known for their hydrating skin properties and often ectodermal dysplasia goes hand and hand with dry skin.  Unfortunately, my first batch of violet infused soap turned out the color of puke and smelled horrible.  I could continue trying to perfect the violet soap, or move on to another idea.  Then my cousin came up with the idea of having something to sell that would help cool customers down, as the festival always seems to be on the hottest day of the weekend.  She even went so far as to donate several hundred cobalt blue glass spritz bottles to me and at that moment, inspired by her creative generosity, I knew what our fundraiser was going to be - a lavender cooling mist.  Not only was it the perfect product to spread awareness and educate people on the rare condition, it was also the perfect purchase for a hot day.  We sold over 120 bottles of cooling mist infused with springs of dried lavender over the three day festival and raised almost $700.  

But the "coolest" part of the entire experience was meeting the daughter of a friend of a friend who also has ectodermal dysplasia, and meeting her family too.  It was like meeting a long lost family member and it is so amazing to see the kind of person she is and to know that Violet will have a beautiful role model to help her journey forward.  As if that wasn't enough to make the fundraiser a complete success, a customer listened to my short blurb about the fundraiser and told me with surprise on her face that she believes she has ectodermal dysplasia but had never known there was a name for it, let alone a genetic condition.  We were both near tears by the time she left my booth, and I hope that she joins the foundation and becomes connected to others who share the condition that both she and Violet have.  Violet is only two, but as her mom, to find others that are facing the same challenges can mean the difference of feeling isolated and alone, or feeling supported and a part of a loving community.

All in all, it was an exhaustingly amazing experience.  I definitely couldn't have pulled it off without the help of my friends and family and I am so grateful for their enthusiasm and support.

After the festival was over, we spent most of the rest of the month at home.  I'd like to say we relaxed the entire time, but we had let so many things slide while I was trying to get things ready for the Lavender Festival that we had to play a bit of catch up.  But it was still more relaxing, as I had missed the slower days that are the result of not having a big deadline hanging over your head!   Will painted the garage and our fence...

.... and we picked berries in our yard and made several batches of strawberry jam, black raspberry jam, and a mixed berry jam.

We enjoyed slow mornings of pancakes, eating outside and cooked lots of fruit cobblers as well as bulk freezer meals to replenish all that we had eaten while I was in festival mode the last couple of months.  While preparing for the Lavender Festival it occurred to me that I feel like I am doing my best job as a mom when I prepare healthy home-cooked meals for my family.  It was hard to cook in a kitchen that was constantly brewing soap, lip balm or salves.  I was so very happy to have my kitchen and my time back to cook for my family again.

Breakfast was about the only meal we ate outside this past month, as it was just way too hot out.  We had picnics in the living room, movie nights and played Legos and did crafts during the hottest parts of the day.

We did kids yoga DVDs while the window air conditioner in the living room blasted full speed, and we even found my old friendship bracelet supplies and I taught Lucy and Emma how to knot bracelets.  In the below right hand picture is my wrist, wearing a bracelet that I had started in my youth, but then stopped after only completing an inch of it.  Lucy expertly finished what my 12 year old hands hadn't finished for one reason or another, and presented it to me. Talk about my past and present world colliding in a happy starburst of love and amazement!

Emma discovered our graphing calculators from high school, college and from the years that Will taught high school math.  She spends hours on them, and carries them with her wherever she goes.  She is figuring out how to use them while engrossed in play!  The below pictures in clockwise order from the top left: Lucy, holding a firefly she caught in a mason jar, Lucy wearing butterfly wings while swinging, all three girls getting ready to release black swallow tail butterflies into the yard, Emma playing with a graphing calculator, and Lucy and Violet playing with a frog.

The girls played with LOTS of play-doh this past month, and because of the generous gifts of friends and family, we ran out of play-doh for the first time ever.  To think we made it seven whole years without ever having to buy any play-doh!  Play-doh is so much work to clean up, but as long as we have several hours at home, it is always worth it in the end, as the girls will play contentedly for hours with it.  There is no free ride, and the price for the hours of happy play is the confetti-sized colorful crumbs all over the table, chairs and floor.  And don't get me started on cleaning the play-doh out of all of the nooks and crannies of the play-doh accessories.  Some of the days this past month were cool enough to use the play-doh outside, which is as close to a free ride as I've ever come.

We enjoyed lots of water play in our own backyard, as well as fun with power tools (bottom middle picture) and for some reason, the girls have tremendous amounts of fun filling their play wheelbarrow with water from the rain barrels and mopping the garage floor.  But before you think we have found a free ride, please realize that apparently there is only one "good" mop and they fight over that as well as whether or not one should free-style mop, or mop in carefully plotted patterns.  

We did venture out from our own property sometimes, but only for things we were really excited about doing.  How nice it was to not have any "have-to's" on the calendar, and only fun things.  We had fun swimming at our aunt and uncle's pool, which is as close to a vacation (if not better with no packing, unpacking or cranky kids) as we always leave feeling so refreshed from good fun, good food and good conversation.

We also had a wonderful time at my God daughter/niece's birthday pool party which again, left us feeling refreshed and happy.  Other family fun this past month included a giant inflated water slide at my cousin's 4th of July party with the added bonus of snuggling my newest God daughter, a backyard barbecue with friends that are like family, lunch with my cousin and her rainbow baby, as well as lunch at my parents house.  See the bottom right hand picture below, of my kids praying Grandma and Grandpa Hines style.

We had many local food adventures too, trying out a crepe restaurant, strawberry slushies from the orchard near us, ice cream cones from the cider mill, and finally, the highlight for Will and I, a Farm to Table dinner in our hometown with all the ingredients sourced from our local Farmer's Market.  The tickets were pricey, so Will and I treated ourselves to a belated wedding anniversary dinner and it was divine.  It inspired us to try to replicate many of the recipes and I can only say that I've improved the peach cobbler we had, but haven't come close enough to anything else.  It was so nice to be inspired with new ways to cook seasonal, fresh food though and I hope our town holds another dinner next summer.

We had other spontaneous adventures that didn't always involve food.  In clockwise order from the top left below: Enjoying a picnic at the property some of my bee hives are on, a beautiful garden my college roommate and I walked through at a herb farm north of us, my girls and I at the creek by our house, Violet touching Luke's etched foot prints on his headstone, Emma and Violet taking advantage of Lucy being gone at a summer day camp to have their baby dolls buckled in Lucy's spot, Will driving home with the girls after running through a parking lot in a torrential down pour, a blue robbin's egg I found on the sidewalk, and finally, my favorite picture, Emma's creative (but desperate) attempt at showing me which way was the exit after extensive whining about wanting to leave the craft store we were in.

We visited two different splash pads this past month with friends and even celebrated a birthday at one while meeting the newest addition to our tribe of kids.  

Lucy had a big month and was excited to have her dream of needing glasses come true.  We took Lucy to an optometrist who specializing in reading as Lucy has been struggling with reading this past year.  Come to find out, Lucy has been seeing double from about two feet out from her nose.  Our poor girl has learned to read in double vision!  After Lucy adjusts to her new glasses, we will take her back to the reading specialist and determine if her eyes have self-adjusted enough, or if we need to pursue vision therapy to help her eye muscles get on track.  Either way, Lucy is so happy and so responsible with her new glasses.

She even showed embarrassment when she noticed my eyes getting misty while she was being fitted for her glasses.  "MOM, come on.  You can't cry at EVERYTHING."  I had to laugh, but getting glasses is a milestone, and I can't help but mark milestones with tears.  I am proud of my girl and how she is growing up.  I just wish time would slow down!  Because of course she looks older and more sophisticated with glasses.  Lucy got to spread her wings a bit this summer too, adding to her more grown up personality, as it seems all of the fun summer camps start at age 7 and up.  She enjoyed a Little House by the Creek camp at the local museum, and also Vacation Bible School at our church.  This was hard for Emma, but we made sure to have fun while Lucy was gone.  Both Lucy and Emma enjoyed a yoga class at the library and both also enjoyed a three day dance camp.

Our happy vacation with Will home ended in a rough way for us.  We came home from a morning out and after playing in the yard for a bit realized that our neighbor's privacy fence that runs along our property line and shares part of our chicken run was torn down.  In shock, we started panicking and looking for our chickens.  It took us over an hour to catch all of them, as they were traumatized and scared.  After confronting our neighbor as to why he tore the fence down without any notice to us, he yelled that he has been a tax paying citizen for so many years and he didn't have to tell us what he was doing on his own property.  Just like that, our peaceful, happy garden felt torn open and violated. As our yard was no longer a safe place for our chickens, we had to pack them up and move them elsewhere.  Our neighbor still is extremely angry with us and has not been open with communication.  We have heard through neighbors though and in the few confrontations we have had with him since, that he believes our chickens are keeping his house from selling.  I can't help but think that now that his privacy fence is gone and the back of our garage and bare dirt is exposed to his yard that this won't help his cause of selling.  The top left hand picture below is of Will and Violet collecting eggs just days before the fence was ripped down.  Violet keeps asking "where chickens go?" in the saddest voice.   We are going through a grieving process with our chickens gone.  They were so much a part of our lives from opening up the coop in the morning with a "good morning ladies!", to closing it each and every night with a "good night ladies."  I always enjoyed the routine and how it connected me in ancient patterns to the weather and to day and night.  Most of our food scraps went to the chickens and it is still so difficult for me to put it in the garbage now that the chickens are gone.  They made the best garden compost around - something that a compost bin cannot match in efficiency or nutrients.  Even just picking off the Japanese beetles from our raspberry bushes and tossing them in to the chickens to eat is something that I sorely miss.  Not to mention collecting eggs, still warm, from our own backyard that minutes later would be whipped up into a yummy breakfast scramble or a delicious baked good.  Our yard no longer feels like our little slice of heaven, but instead an exposed and painful place, empty without the loved personalities of our sweet hens.

Our city's ordinance about chickens states that if you have an acre of property, you can have 12 chickens.  We have under an acre of property, so have always tried to keep 11 or less.  We knew all along though that if someone were to have a problem with our chickens that we would not be protected in keeping them.  Five years ago we went to our city hall and asked how to go about getting chickens.  We talked to many different people at the city offices, and they all either had no idea, or just thought we were joking.  Finally, it came down to that as long as we had no complaints, we could do whatever we wanted.  Four years later, I believe it is time for us to change the ordinance so that the mood of our neighbors doesn't dictate how we feed our family.  To think that a dog that barks 24/7 is a right, but to keep something that makes little to no noise (we don't have a rooster) and feeds our family is not a right.  We have become so far removed from our own roles in feeding ourselves that someone's bad day can take away one of our food sources.  That very day our chickens were set free to the neighborhood we took our kids down to city hall and began the process of changing the ordinance.  It could take weeks or it could take years, but as long as I am a resident of this city, I will be persistent in getting the ordinance changed.  It is time to take back our food rights and as daunting as the task seems, I keep reminding myself that I am responsible for my own backyard and if I don't like it, I have the ability to change it.   Will and I feel very strongly about raising our own food and teaching our children through hands on experience where food comes from.  We love our house and our city however we are trying to keep our hearts and our minds open as to where we are to go from here.  Our house and our location are secondary to our beliefs in how we want to raise our family.  If God is nudging us towards a change of scenery, so be it.  But until we have further direction, we will be working to change the ordinance on chickens, as well as doing our best to be an example to our kids as to how to manage anger and the appropriate way to handle a situation in which anger is directed towards you.   We are bummed that our vacation with Will was tainted by our neighbor's anger and are battling with so much internal frustration about this entire situation.  We will however rise from this unfortunate event stronger, wiser, and even closer to our goals.  It may take a while, but as I read the other day in a Facebook quote, the time will pass either way, so why not try to do something while it passes.

Violet at 27 Months

Violet has been a handful this past month, even with two full-time parents to handle her as Will was home on vacation.  Although, the below picture occurred with just me home.  While I was on the phone with my sister, Violet flipped out of the front door, through the screen.  I yelled, tossed my phone, and dove after her.  Fortunately Lucy picked up the phone and explained to my sister what had happened and that besides shaken (and in the case of the screen door, torn) we were all okay.

Violet has let us know in various ways that she is ready to be potty trained, so this past month we took on the challenge, thinking with two parents home, how bad could it be?  You would think our third time around too, that we would be completely prepared for the task ahead.  The first day we went shopping without a thought in our head, or a diaper bag in our hand, and were aghast when Violet alerted us to the puddle around her in aisle 8 of the craft store.  Will took care of the puddle while I took Violet to the bathroom.  I wrapped the wet underwear in paper towel and stuffed it in my pocket while coaching Violet to leave her dress down while we finished our shopping.  All was going well until Violet decided to show Emma, "Look Emma I no wear undies!" in the checkout lane.  A nice couple behind us spoke a different language to each other in hushed tones which I could only translate to: "We must keep our son away from this family!"

The first day or two we went through about twelve wardrobe changes a day.  We are now at an accident or two every day, but with a few days sprinkled in of no accidents at all.  We've washed and scrubbed so many things, and are now more prepared.  We bring back-up outfits as well as wipes and her little frog potty if we will be gone for too long.  Violet is still wearing diapers at night, and will wake up in the morning dry every so often too.  I am not ready for the laundry involved with night time potty training, so at this point, she seems okay with wearing a diaper to bed, so we will wait as long as we can before crossing that bridge.  Besides, she hasn't slept through the night a day in her life yet, and I don't want her worried about keeping her jammies dry to give her another reason to wake up.  She wears underwear for naps, since her naps are generally no longer than 30 minutes.

All in all, Violet is doing amazing with potty training, especially considering how hot our summer has been and the fact that she doesn't sweat.  This equals crazy amounts of peeing, as she has to drink more water than the average two year old to maintain her body temperature.

Violet had two ear infections this past month, and it was so hard to see her in so much pain.  They were her first, and it was heartbreaking.  Fortunately our chiropractor was able to adjust her at last minute appointments and as soon as she hopped off of the table, her ear felt better.  I'm wondering if all of our swimming has attributed to them and if perhaps we should look into ear plugs for her.  We have spent so much time in water play with Violet - every single day I have swimsuits hanging to dry and towels going in the wash.  It has been the only way to deal with the extreme heat of the summer while still allowing Violet to play outside.  I'm not complaining - in fact I think it has helped us enjoy all that summer has to offer to the max!

Now that I'm thinking about it though, her ear infections also could have been related to the fact that she is getting two molars!  This is a big deal for Violet, and once her molars are completely in, we can start the next step in her dental plan.  We are very excited for her teeth, but wow, has she been cranky and not to mention how it has affected her already poor sleep.

Violet learned how to use a big kid swing this past month.  She LOVES swinging!  She loved swinging before in her baby swing, but this leap to a big kid swing has elevated her love for swinging even more.  The unfortunate thing for Will and I though is that she demands us to push her and while we are pushing her, whines and complains about how we aren't pushing her high enough.  This gets old very fast.

Despite her being a handful, she is adorable and cute and squishy.  I am always telling her, "Violet, you are so cute!" To which she responds, "I not cute, I Violet!"  For which I respond, "Violet, you are so adorable!" To which she responds, "I not adorable, I Violet!" And on and on we go...

Violet loves playing with her baby dolls and spends much of her day taking care of them.  She also loves doing crafts at the table with her sisters including drawing, play-doh and painting and will demand play-doh non-stop which I usually say no to because it is so messy to clean up.  Violet loves painting our nails at her beauty shop in the basement, and also loves playing outside.

She is such a goof, and sometimes she is funny without even trying.  The other day Will went to grab his briefcase for work and found Violet's play laptop tucked on top.  She has a love of fashion glasses, and also will destroy any lip balm she gets her hands on.  She half chews it, drools on it and smears it on her lips.  Fortunately, it is all edible since I make it at home to sell for Harding Honey, but it does cut into my bottom line if I accidentally leave the lip balm within her reach!

Violet likes to tell anyone who comes too close to me, "MY Mama!" while squeezing her way in.  Lucy and Emma like to respond back that I was their mama first which makes Violet even more possessive.  Violet loves to impersonate people and even when tattling does a pretty good impression of the tone of voice and inflection that Lucy or Emma used when offending her.  She also is very expressive with her lips and likes to put on a pout face to be funny and can hold a straight face while delivering a joke.  She also loves singing and while listening to some of our well-worn playlists in the car can be heard from the backseat singing every third or fourth word which is amazingly cute.  Violet, you exhaust us, entertain us, and tackle life with such energy and fun!  You are the comic relief and the reason I can't relax or sleep.  You are lucky you are so cute!